As Amazon Prime Minister I’m ringleader of the carefree world

Carry a pen, should you need to write “Note to self: Congratulations!”

I didn’t start consistently moonwa… until they required us to wear Fit… to qualify for our employee health…

At bottom God is a brute fact and Satan a brutal fact

The Cookie Monster is just living up to the name Kermit gave him

The truth will set you free but consensus will get you academi… i.e., tenure

It used to be true that “All the world’s a stage” but now that all the world wide web’s a gauge the real world’s but a Faraday Ca…

I disapprove of what you say but I will defend to the death your right not to mean it

My mistake was believing that Smart was short for book smart When actually Book smart is short for book smart… I only figured this out

Pacifism is the ultimate weapon For if you can prohibit your enemy From defending himself Then all that’s left Is to love him to death

Secure in my authenticity I thought I’d avoided that trap which had ensnared so many of my g… the safety of ironic distance– until I realized that

God isn’t dead which is another way of saying God isn’t unemployed and still has the same job just with a new job description

The Declaration of Independence w… revised to guarantee life, security and the pursuit of criminals

When I got my first honey-do list after the wedding I explained to my bride that I us… until I was bitten by one of the 5… that don’t make webs

As users of language we give off meaning the same way that plants as users of sunlight give off oxygen