It took the spies of Five Eyes to tell that Putin wasn’t bluffin’ But just ask the staff at Five Gu… and they’ll tell you Trump’s MacG… He longs for Daddy’s approval

Power is the ability To maintain your non-negotiables And the world to come Will arrive when we stop trying To negotiate a new deal with God

Our thick skulls are a double-edge… Protecting our fragile brains When we are brained with an actual… Even as we are so hardheaded That the truth about our lust for…

The truth will set you free but consensus will get you academi… i.e., tenure

When they closed all the beaches my dad said not to worry and I just knew he’d install the swimming pool I’d always wante… Instead, I came home from school

Denial was a lot easier when your head was in the clouds but your memories were stored on microfiche

Most lives are lived in service to one institution or another but only very recently has this begun to feel

When they told me I was one of many I took them to mean I was the one

I thought I was choosing between Life and death When really, I was choosing betwe… First and last place So, when I thought I chose life

You need a high in– come to claim the moral high ground on your taxes

There’s nothing you can say to me that I haven’t already ignored

Before you know it The next big thing Is already The next best thing I suppose there’s worse things tha…

Like generals husbands are always preparing to f… while their wives are always prepa… to fight the last just war

I may look like a tall glass of water but be– ware, I’m half empty

An army marches on its stomach but it convoys on its internal combustion engine Still, the way to