Both my parents were tall and I ended up a shrimp Not coincidentally, my diet has al… largely consisted of pink flamingo… though scientists insist that it’s…

Can’t buy me love but you can buy me likes

Thanks to his bifocals Ben Franklin could see that while we might look like bald… up close we’re clearly turkeys

Nobody grows up wanting to be a mot– ivational speaker

I have not loved my neighbor as my… but I have consistently greeted hi… with an insouciant bonhomie

First, we learn how to walk Then we learn how to walk away For many of us This takes the rest of our lives But if we never give up

Where once it was widely understoo… That the only way to defeat evil Is by defeating it Which is always possible because God is in control

The most common form of fooling ourselves isn’t thinking we’ve got everyone fooled… It’s denial that we’ve fooled anyo…

We’re all like unharvested potatoe… covered in dirt thinking that means we’ve got the dirt on each other

What is wrong with the world today?: Dear Sir or Madam, You are.

It was all systems go in my search for a new belief syst… until I realized all systems go too far

In the age of divorce It needs to be said: If you don’t want to end up divorc… Do not covet your neighbor’s ex-wi…

I used to pretend that Kafka’s The Trial was my favorite book but these days I bring a courtroom stenographer with me

God took the risk of betting on us Because He made us to embrace ris… God is betting that we pass our on… What are you willing to risk your… a. Everything

It turns out that the afterlife is only as long as you can keep the exit interview go…