Carry a pen, should you need to write “Note to self: Congratulations!”

I may look like a tall glass of water but be– ware, I’m half empty

You’re only a real materialist If you demand that believers Do the impossible And then get angry When they prove you wrong

There is one reason And one reason alone That God won’t ever give up on yo… You are His job And God loves His job

Monotheism is true; Liberalism works Put them together and The true works

We have achieved the classless society: eve– rything is tacky

Obscene Is an institution with a 50.7 bill… Coveting an additional 686 million… To cover two-thirds of its researc… Because the truth is

They say that it is impossible To travel at the speed of light But slow and steady Always wins the race Because it is actually

God has each of us on a leash And it is almost exactly like the… That let’s your dog roam within li… But for one crucial difference– On God’s leash we can go

The unconscious is to repression as The algorithms are to redaction

Life’s greatest mystery is how other people could possibly have as little interest in my Spotify playlists

If we know our physics is real Because GPS works Then we know our God is real Because language works

In a real life version of the ugly duckling discovering h… I was the reject popsicle stick who at long last found out I was a handy tongue depressor

As social animals the central question of our lives asked and answered answered and asked day upon day

Unsatisfied with the miracle of li… Peaceful transfer of power in serv… The peace movement plans to establ… A mostly peaceful monopoly on powe…