Living during COVID-19 Was like trying to eat A bag of individually wrapped M&M…
Whether it’s a brute fact Or a gift from God We are free Is this fair? It depends on
Everything dear to you? You can take all of that and throw it out the Overton window
When I caught my wife cutting up… she said it was to prevent birds getting stuck in them like six-pac…
The screen you’re looking at seven hours a day is actually a magnifying glass
Catwoman shamed Batman into getting out of the Batmobile… by telling him it was just like ec…
Staring at your phone came to be known as the thousand yard stare
People think that the spork didn’t include any aspects of the… because the serrated edge of the prospective all-in-one utensil kept slicing open the focus group…
The epic poem for this epoch will have to say the most with the least
If you want to know what the quarantine was like for me walk a mile in my new leather sweatpants
The faceless horde finds strength in numbers by losing themselves in the crowd But when your numbers are small
We spend most of our waking lives alternating between procrastinatio… and delayed gratification as if by putting things off we’ve bought ourselves more time
Your brain doesn’t know the differ… between physical and psychological… knowing only what they have in com… Because both are life threatening your brain sends you into fight, f…
Entire lives can be lived waiting for the other shoe to drop although often this just means you’re being crushed at a snail’s…
It’s because certain questions will get you killed that certain other questions are also answers
