In the confession booth I have a confession to make so that I can receive forgiveness In the show trial I have a confession to make up

All relationships but one Are located on a continuum From one pole of complete trust To the opposite pole of total fear The exception that proves the rule

When they start to call you clear-eyed it just means you’re a cynic whose time has come

This is a much simpler question than What does a woman want? Hamas wants to kill all Jews in Israel

Unlike the Americans and the Engl… who are divided by a common langua… the Americans and the Parisians are divided by a common symptom: disappointment

I was born in the summer of my 47th year coming home to a place my mazel’d ever been before

The first half of life Is spent waiting for the inevitabl… But inevitably, you get distracted… Because a watched pot never boils The second half of life

In this charming reboot of a classic kidlit gumshoe series our eponymous hero Wikipedia Brown solves thought crimes by

Peace is not the goal It is the byproduct of the goal The goal is obvious Which is why we can’t see it

We think nothing’s shocking since we’ve seen it all when really it’s because we’re blind to the obvious

In a real life version of the ugly duckling discovering h… I was the reject popsicle stick who at long last found out I was a handy tongue depressor

Yes, we have no bananas but we still need you to play second banana

You would think doing well on social media would give you strength in numbers but you only end up

The smartest gal in the room Is the one who realizes All the adults in the room Are emotional children Behaving like holy terrors

I will state the obvious sacrilege… Hailing from sunny San Diego Stone Temple Pilots was just as g… As talented; rocked as hard As the Big 4 Seattle bands–