We’ve gone from treating people as a means to an end to using them as props for pretend
Notice how the giraffe evolved so that its neck is precisely long… to reach the water when it bends d…
Whoever said It’s lonely at the top must have never had their own spelling group in third grade
If Wile E. Coyote ever caught the Roadrunner he’d suddenly lose interest
Which came first The morals Or the justification Hint: The #1 excuse
We mistake the feeling of control for the feeling of freedom when freedom actually consists of the courage to take risks Those who encourage us
Marriage is the only place I’m neither feature nor bug but both
Pay attention to what is said: “One day we hope to enable every p… to feel as strong a sense of conne… as you feel when you’re physically with someone you love”
Reasonable people can disagree By agreeing to disagree But unreasonable people Can’t disagree on anything So, they have to agree on everythi…
Where before It was handed to me on a silver-pl… Where everything real was just bel… Now I’ve found the real way forwa… By making it up as I go along
I tried doing everything right Until I dug a hole Took a right turn at Albuquerque And realized There are no straight lines in my…
A funny thing happened when I told them that you can either laugh or you can cr… No one laughed but for a second
You cannot beat God in any sport but you can tie Him in bowling
I bought a Toyota because it’s bulletproof to compensate for the fact that I’m not even rubber bulletproof
Our bodies are exactly as strong as gravity’s resistance makes them… in recognition of mortality we symbolize this through the know… that gravity is the weakest
