Everybody knows the unwritten rule… Everybody thinks they know the unw… Nobody knows when the unwritten pu…
For a long time, the centrists were at the center of attention where the action was But now they find themselves at the center of a hall of mirrors
Instead of a scythe the mirthful reaper carried balloo… and we just floated away
Not to be outdone I cut my face off to spite my nose
If Star Wars is actually told From R2-D2’s perspective Then our only hope Is that God lets us go on believi… We are more powerful
Paper comes from trees but when money was made of paper we all agreed that money doesn’t grow on trees
We used to have the haves and the have nots But then the haves were further subdivided into the haves and the have to
My wife is a lot like God If God weren’t perfect Like Him, she’s my toughest criti… But also my fiercest champion
I’m always asking God What is the meaning of life? In response, God looks at my life… What is the meaning of this?
Life is a talent show where most everyone is doing bad versions of easy impressions
In Putin’s version of Let’s Make… he shows you what’s behind Door #1… - You let Putin run you through w… AND what’s behind Door #2: - You fall on your sword to atone…
Pay attention to what is said: “One day we hope to enable every p… to feel as strong a sense of conne… as you feel when you’re physically with someone you love”
The difference between the Pax Romana and the Pax Americana is that while all roads lead to Rome
It took years of therapy but the octopus finally arrived at… that the reason she didn’t like th… was because they were so much alik…
Every night when Smokey Bear would tuck me in… the last thing he always said was Only you can prevent forest fires