100% of success is showing up on time
Yes, we have no bananas but we still need you to play second banana
“Democracy is the worst form of go… Except for all those other forms t… Since all other forms involve deat… And democracy merely involves symb… But democracy has an illness
A record sounds the same every time you play it A broken record is intolerable because it isn’t broken, it’s just…
Let good intentions be my sword and naivete my shield
The ugly duckling Is not a duck But he is a lucky duck
The question isn’t: Why is there something rather than nothing? It’s: Why does it mean something
It turns out that the afterlife is only as long as you can keep the exit interview go…
Because it’s so hellacious transmuting lead into gold the people pleaser finds it heavenly to degrade gold into lead
The number one cause of divorce Is holding a grudge We are divorced from reality Because we hold a grudge against t… We resent the truth
Whenever it looks like the Jews have finally been accepted by their host culture you can be sure that trouble for the Jews
Pressure is wanting it for someone else Passion is wanting it
To be the bigger person you need to realize that egos are like animals: the smaller their proportions the greater their proportional str…
Faced with a forced choice The agnostic feigns ignorance For if you ask a woman to marry yo… And she says I don’t know
Heart cancer is vanishingly rare because a heart of gold only spreads love, not gold while a mind of gold inevitably spreads all the way