After you’ve uploaded everything t… and run the lot of it through the… be sure to recycle, but keep a lit… perhaps in a locket around your ne… or, if you go in for irony,

It turns out that the afterlife is only as long as you can keep the exit interview go…

During the lockdown you were still technically allowed to exercise outdoors but I rigged up

It wasn’t until I earned my MBA that I understood the second comin… as an incredible opportunity for r… e.g, think about the implications… Jesus updated from sandals to toe…

Social media has made the famous so accessible that it’s like you can see the face of… but instead of dying you want to take a nap

A memory hole should be just deep enough to bury yourself up to the neck– Any deeper

The Cookie Monster is just living up to the name Kermit gave him

People are only willing to wait and see when they already know what they are looking for

In France everyone thinks Scotch tape is crap

There used to be two types of peop… Those who wanted to Go ahead and get it over with And those who wanted to postpone t… This enabled some degree of self-s…

We thought it would last forever but in retrospect we were having a high time at low tide when the clam digging was easy and the eating was good

Strange how we’re so worried about Artificial Intelligence taking ov… when we’ve long since succumbed to Artificial Emotional Intelligence in the belief that if we

Honesty is the best policy but it’s not an evidence-based practice

You and God are like socks– No matter how far apart you get You are still a pair You and God are also like pants– Even though you are forever one

Theoretically, Schrodinger’s Cat is both alive and dead at the same time In reality, cats have nine lives and one death