Blood is thicker than water Unless it’s blood From a turnip

We are gathered around our phones Like little campfires And all we ever hear Are scary stories

Chapter 1- Defense Mechanisms, an… We all defend ourselves– If you are unprepared to defend yo… It just means that Your defense is unconscious

People want to get rich because they think money will make them happy People want to stay rich because they know that money

Maybe We’re all Late bloomers

Never answer a yes or no question. Answer the question that you wish had been asked of you: “Ms. Magill, I’m gonna give you one more opportunity for the world to see your answer. Does...

You can’t know what you will decid… But you will know when you have de… You can’t know how you will act on… But you already know what is at st… Everything hangs in the balance;

I still believe that anything is possible It’s just that now nothing would surprise me

Life’s greatest mystery is how other people could possibly have as little interest in my Spotify playlists

You can’t watch sports these days… Father Time is undefeated Which is when I always quote Saul… “Vait a minute. Vat about Rocky…

When the shit hits the fan at least I know I won’t be wearing flip-flops

The fruit of the tree of knowledge… Has fully ripened In the form of the internet Which looms large With the promise of looming catast…

When I was standing in the shallow end I really believed I was all in only later coming to realize

When I got my first honey-do list after the wedding I explained to my bride that I us… until I was bitten by one of the 5… that don’t make webs

I always like to know where I stand and I always bring an umbrella that can double