Now you only get to choose which hill you’re going to comply on

Looking back on college it’s unclear if I was a party animal party mineral or party vegetable

Upon my retirement I thought to myself Maybe now I can get some work don…

Our glass Is an hourglass And whether it is half-full Or half-empty Time is running out

Exhausted by the pendulum swings b… feeling overwhelmed and disappoint… we’ve taken elements from Too much, too soon and

Everybody impersonates who they used to be but only some are impostors

You could say I tried stand-up but for the audience it was more like when the flight attendant demonstrates how to put on your own oxygen mask…

Don’t sweat the small stuff. It’s all big stuff.

The opposite of bad breath Isn’t good breath It’s fresh breath Because all breath is good So, you never have to hold your br…

Inasmuch as handling gold is always a thorny affair all gold is rose gold but black gold

On a gray scale Of one to ten I’m a perfect five

What do all apples have in common? It only takes one rotten apple to… Because all apples are unique But a mob of apples are uniquely b…

Everybody knows The pen is mightier than the sword But few understand That it’s because The pen is a lightsaber

2/3 of the Earth Is covered by water So, most of the underground Is under water Accordingly, in dreams

Social media came for our teenage… and unable to organize their inner… they turned their aggression inwar… Now AI is coming for our teenage… and unable to impact the external…