Like a fine wine liberalism only rises to the subli… with a good pairing

Materialism is no way out of Cartesian dualism It just turns backwards– I am, therefore I think– in an infinite regress

Everyone knows it could go either way but no one believes it could have gone either way So we tell ourselves

I wasn’t shocked when scientists announced that a universe already infinitely… could still be expanding because I do have an ego

People think that their report car… will be graded Pass/Fail but since God has a mysterious rep… He gives two grades in every subje… You get an A for effort

You wanted them all to yourself because they didn’t want anything to do with you and this is the sound of

The difference between your superego and God is that your superego says You must, but you can’t leaving you with worlds of guilt

My wife– All 5 feet of her– Busted me out of prison So that I could get back To a life of time

When we poll people about what the weather in heaven is like the most popular answer perhaps not surprisingly is like a cold day in hell

When we say something is infinite Say, the universe What we really mean Is that it is unfinished

And then it hit me: My lone flaw is not admitt– ing to any flaws

The days of having a cold spell have given way to the era of casting a cold spell

Let good intentions be my sword and naivete my shield

They let Potter get away with any… but somehow I get expelled for flo… that a wizard can’t have the same… even though zero (magic) is only half as large as double ze…

In the last stage of capitalism the rich will be ascetics