When I was a kid people grew on me like grass Now they’re more like sod
I was always trying to find The signal in the noise Until I found God And discovered that It’s all signal
Feminism’s big mistake is thinking it can use a power vac… to clean up the patriarchy’s mess
The funny thing is if you’re continually nervous about getting into a wreck you become a nervous wreck and then
Happiness is the moment after the weight of the world is lifted from your shoulders and before it lands on your toe
When I was a kid we thought the end of the world was coming any minute via The Button Instead it came a little later
They say love it or leave it yet what do you do if you love your country but it leaves you
A movement can only cohere around a shared wish and the left sticks together by collectively wishing that Jews deserve what they get
In all my years as warden I could never figure out how to co… with NFPA code 14.14.1.5.1- “Access to exits shall be marked b… readily visible signs in all cases…
What if I could just do no wrong Then surely, I’d still get to bel… Perforce, I did nothing And found myself bluffing Whenever I needed to be strong
The duel with yourself is whether Your life will be a duel with God Or a duel against others This is the fight of your life And you have two hands
People keep repeating the same mis… Until they learn their lesson But what if the lesson is that History repeats itself? If you’ve skimmed your Nietzsche
God is like a gifted analyst In that He leads you to reach Your own conclusions God is unlike an analyst In that He doesn’t interpret your…
The stapler inevitably jams And it’s always the stapler That jams the copier Except for the times it jams When you try to copy something you…
Mid-life is when you realize you’re in a clown car The end of life is about accepting that of all the clowns
