The surest way to know That God is always there for us Is that we always have a choice This is why religion and liberalis… Are a match made in heaven

Denial was a lot easier when your head was in the clouds but your memories were stored on microfiche

If your phalanges cause you to philander pluck off the ring

Many people think of life as a gift but to me it’s more like

How many introverts does it take to change a light bulb? None– We turn to an inner light

The three day seminar culminated with walking across smooth sea glass and still cutting our feet

People complain that Jews stick t… In spite of, or, more likely, beca… That it is why Jews are still her… And always will be Jews stick together because

Secure in my authenticity I thought I’d avoided that trap which had ensnared so many of my g… the safety of ironic distance– until I realized that

Life is simple; the meaning of life is complicated As a man I’m a simple creature but I’ve been married long enough… that women are complicated

An uninterrupted winning streak Can only be had through An unchanging mean streak

In becoming a celebrity a person meets the same kind of de… that a tree does in becoming a Christmas tree– embalmed in sugar

If I’ve learned one thing from Pa… it’s that until I believe in God I will be enslaved to others That would have been enough! But I also learned that

You can either learn to ride a bik… with no hands in order to show off or to free your hands for another task

Your mind Is playing a trick on you And you are the trick But since all healing Is a form of getting over yourself

He may have gotten away with mass… But at least we didn’t let him Get away with murder