We all know death is coming and yet it remains a surprise ending

I’ll never forget when a guy standing in his front yard confronted me about looking into parked car windows mistaking me for a car thief

If I’ve learned one thing from Pa… it’s that until I believe in God I will be enslaved to others That would have been enough! But I also learned that

If you take a hot-blooded child and raise him in a cold-blooded cu… don’t be surprised when you get a lukewarm-blooded vulture

When randomness blends with lawfulness you get the Loch Ness

Life is simple; the meaning of life is complicated As a man I’m a simple creature but I’ve been married long enough… that women are complicated

Told to shut my mouth I took them literally Zipped my lips And held my breath Until I could stomach it no longe…

At long last Today is the day I owe it all to you And I can only repay my debt By giving my all

The state of nature, where there’s Something for everyone To fear Monotheism, where there’s Something for everyone

She believed me when I said that my life was based on a true story

According to experts There are only seven basic plots Limited to the believable There are no experts on the truth Because the truth

In granting us free will God took the greatest of risks God also made us in His image God risked it all on us Risking it all on Him

We can’t fool God But we can fool ourselves into thi… We fooled God The surest way to do so Is to fool ourselves into thinking

People wonder how long it will tak… AI to get smarter than us but the smart money is on us getting dumber than AI first

I know how it must sound– A two-year long two—week lockdown— But let me expound And dish the lowdown: What we fear’s a hoedown