Life has given us pumpkins ostensibly for carving and smashing but I smell an opportunity though the opportunity cost
A wedding ring is a mood ring that never changes color reminding us that a husband should always feel
Our souls have a body Our bodies have five senses And we all have a sixth sense That there is no sixth sense Yet we’re left with a sense of sel…
A fair competition Is one in which No one can win So that everyone Has an equal chance
Mid-life is when you realize you’re in a clown car The end of life is about accepting that of all the clowns
If you are taught that asserting yourself is wrong your only defense will be victimho… Knowing this we can reverse engineer
It’s taken me this long to underst… like Pee Wee Herman I meant to do that though I’m still unsure why Because as hard as it’s been
It turns out that the afterlife is only as long as you can keep the exit interview go…
You can’t burn a bridge when they’ve already dismantled th… to keep you out but you can burn an eternal flame to mark the location
In polite society The most threatening words are alw… I’m disappointed in you Which is politesse for There’s a knife in you
When people ask Business or pleasure? I want to say Life’s only pleasure Is unfinished business
The distant past– Strong enough for a man, pH balan… The recent past– Strong enough for a woman The present–
100% of success is showing up on time
As the enormous asteroid hurtled toward Earth I found myself working harder than ever
Forecasting the rain in Spain is mainly done in vain
