A wise man once told me that there are two kinds of family prob… He said Family Problem #1 is not having a family

For human beings the dominant sens… So, coming to our senses Would necessarily involve restorin… By removing our blinders Which keep us from seeing anything

Jews learned to read between the l… when time and again they were granted a lifetime membe… only to find that their membership could still be lapsed

When an American marries into a brood of Scots it’s a matter of when and not if we overdo it with the family tarta…

If I said– The worst thing you can say about… is that he always plays it safe– then he sounds like a perfectly ni… But when I say–

The surest sign That people don’t know what they w… Is when they want to have it both… But since you can’t have it both w… They settle for enforcing one way

At the end of life you can either say I brought it or I bought it

A snowflake is a raindrop With a pattern that has crystalliz… And we are seeing patterns all aro… Because hell is finally freezing o…

I’ve never believed in being proac… so instead of expecting the unexpe… I got the surprise of my life but found it altogether unexceptio…

When Eddie Money said “I’ve got two tickets to paradise” he didn’t mention that the paradise sales team only sells tickets in pairs

Charlie Brown wants To believe Lucy wants To deceive But maybe, just maybe

I know I’m losing an argument with my friends when my thoughts turn to lunch I know I’m winning when I’m about to lose my lunch

In theory rule by consensus sounds more democratic but in practice it leads to hung juries

I’m converting to Judaism but I’m a Scorpio so, I have a head start

It was all systems go in my search for a new belief syst… until I realized all systems go too far