God is the world’s only super-bower

She went to law school; I bet it all on brick ov– en pita and lost

If husbands were like pro basketball players I’d be an all star but one with an exceptionally low trade value

The turning point came after I pegged my happi– ness to the dollar

Whenever an authority figure says It’s my way or the highway I end up wanting to have it both w…

I need the guy who trains your mind so that you can walk barefoot across hot coals to come to my house

The last waltz isn’t over until they come waltzing back in

When your nuclear family of origin Takes the nuclear option They’ve already gone mad and self-… So, they’re counting on mutual ass… To finish the job

If nothing is possible Because of the inevitable– We mortals all die in the end– Then we are left to do the impossi… And become immortal by

The distorting effects of social m… have left us warped But we’ve made the best of it seeking our daily pleasure in deciding what

Socialists count on the fact that there are no private languages but there is

You know a hipster is aging gracef… When he comes to see that Objects in mirror Are closer than they appear

Failure to pay the narcissistic wa… results in a fit of rage that cannot be assuaged short of an all against all rampag…

When you can work from anywhere anywhere will do

It’s a sign of the times that No matter the path you take You will know you are finding God When first you become an embarrass… And only then receive