Under new management, hell now consists of friendly fire
Life’s unhappiest surprises always come from those you’ve known forever without ever knowing the score but now you will
A student’s job has always been to put received knowledge into their own words or, more simply to state the obvious
A record sounds the same every time you play it A broken record is intolerable because it isn’t broken, it’s just…
At this late juncture All eating is competitive eating But in the world to come All competition will be An excuse for a feast
Never Win Anything
Why bother keeping score when death assures that things always end in a tie Soon you’ll be able to get rid of death
By preserving crucial memories Your amygdala prepares for the fut… Through understanding the past By digging strategic memory holes The internet controls the present
The two-week lockdown To bend the curve Turned into a year-and-a-half That bent our minds When
Nothing is esoteric The mystical is the every-day There are no secrets But there is a lot of denial
Our grueling cascade of online spa… Is like the spider’s prey’s strugg… Designed to exhaust us As the spider patiently looks on Motionless
It always comes down to what is most important to you and what is most important to you is not knowing what is most import…
The first thing you’re taught is t… you can make some of the people drink Coke all of the time and you can make all of the people drink Coke some of the time but
All fiction Is serious fiction Because all fiction Is life and death Everything on the internet
My self-care plan includes a cheat day when I get to go to church
