It’s almost impossible to tell the difference between self-effacement and self-abasement In the former he stays down to earth

I had just started explaining smar… When the alien stopped me in mid-s… And explained smart phones to me Originally, in order to monitor an… They were just going to attach

I don’t believe in myself So, I must control God I believe in God So, I can control myself

You can’t take it with you tells us how to live well But we think it means living forev… and so, we’ve invested in Shell In the hopes that our savings will…

People are like whales who have gotten sick of plankton

Upon dying peacefully in my sleep surrounded by family after a long, prosperous life the Grim Reaper looked at me and… I’m glad to see you’ve arrived saf…

A leader attracts a following The following attracts a crowd The crowd mobs the leader The leader forms a mob The mob goes mental

To avoid road rage all rearview mirrors have been replaced by screens displaying a real-time computerize… of the way things ought to be

Self-flattery will get you everywhere but there’s nowhere left to go

Riddle me this: The Riddler commits crimes of the… By loving each and every one of us… But always leaves clues behind In the form of a riddle

I may not be the man who has everything but I’m the man who knows what to get for the man who has everything

In showing us what darkness looks… fog is equal and opposite to stars lighting up the night sky

Carry a pen, should you need to write “Note to self: Congratulations!”

The turning point came after I pegged my happi– ness to the dollar

What do you call a wolf in sheep’s clothing who believes you are what you wear? The ruling class