“Underachievers Please Try Harder”
As a child
Whenever I played Ms. Pac Man
On my Atari 2600
I dialed the settings down
From four ghosts to one
Which I could always outrun
And run up the score
To spare me this fate
God sent me a wife and three daughters
Who run me around
At the proper ratio of four to one
So I never stand a chance–
God knew it was my only chance
