The pleasure in a magic show is wondering how the magician did it

The difference between God and ma… When we get up to our usual shenan… God always says Frankly my dear, I do give a damn

One wonders how they arrived at the 140 character limit per Twe… Did they consult the Kabbalah the average length of haiku or the heart rate of the hummingbi…

Hell is a bottomless pit Making the first step towards heav… Hitting rock bottom I’m addicted to control And I’m handing control back to G…

When people meet me they typically think I’m a sensitive guy but later they realize I’m a time sensitive guy

Heads I bite my tongue Tails You cut it off

People thought they could finally come and go as they pleased if they could just be rid of the g… only to find in their absence not just more and bigger gates

The surest sign That people don’t know what they w… Is when they want to have it both… But since you can’t have it both w… They settle for enforcing one way

I believe in the great man theory of history because the good man theory of history is so obviously false

God knows In a game of hide and seek The best place to hide everything Is right in front of your nose So, you’ll never believe what I j…

There’s more than one way to move… So, I’m always beavering away At my dam that bends the river Far, far away from the foot of the…

One would think the earth is flat “Unless” as the Coen brothers put it “round is funny”

Everyone thinks Vladimir and Estr… stay together because they’re both waiting for Godot when really it’s their mutual disdain for Wile E. Coyote

People still make all the mistakes but now A.I. does all the learning

You’re only a real materialist If you demand that believers Do the impossible And then get angry When they prove you wrong