I thought I’d crafted a mystique when all I’d rea– lly made were mistakes

The lion hasn’t lain down with the lamb if, in its slumber the lion dreams it’s a lamb

I’ve started blind copying my wife on emails to myself

Where once I feared death Now I fear that Death will be anticlimactic

The opposite of bad breath Isn’t good breath It’s fresh breath Because all breath is good So, you never have to hold your br…

I don’t have any delusions of grandeur; I have delusions of posthumous grandeur that would retroactively nullify

If you have to ask how much pursuing it will cost you then you’ve already given way on your desire

In families adept at keeping open secrets no one expects you to state the obvious

We are on the cusp of a great cala… The war of all against all Will commence as soon as No one lifts a finger Do not be fooled–

Actual justice consists of hearing both sides of the story in order to decide which side is in the right meaning that justice

Ours was the first all you can eat… to earn a coveted Michelin star and I always thought it was becaus… when you ordered the whole enchila… it came with bottomless fries

There are three kinds of lies: lies, damned lies, and antisemitism

“The human body generates more bio…

Civilization began When the sons killed the father And substituted the name-of-the-fa… Civilization is ending Now that we’ve killed off the name…

I have just complet– ed my memoirs: One Hundred Years of Solid Food