When I was standing in the shallow end I really believed I was all in only later coming to realize

In my culture low hanging fruit is considered a delicacy

Our phones are latched to our face… Exactly like the Facehugger in Al… Rendering us passive As our phones insert the bioweapon We call fear

It’s still wise not to panic but now it’s because you need to keep your powder dry for a moral panic

A movement can only cohere around a shared wish and the left sticks together by collectively wishing that Jews deserve what they get

People thought they could finally come and go as they pleased if they could just be rid of the g… only to find in their absence not just more and bigger gates

Life’s unhappiest surprises always come from those you’ve known forever without ever knowing the score but now you will

Only a fool believes that the river obeys the riverbed

The soul is an appendix made of wo… and while plenty of people function perfectly well without on… much like the physical appendix– which stores good bacteria

They let Potter get away with any… but somehow I get expelled for flo… that a wizard can’t have the same… even though zero (magic) is only half as large as double ze…

Let there be light blight and hindsight

Every time I screw up God says what He has to say and then He says Over and I always think

Beginner is talking yourself into doing what you are going to do anyway Advanced is talking yourself out of doing

The central paradox of our broken world is known through the feeling of unsurprised disappointment Hope is the belief

Imagine the disappointment when we… both wearing Velcro singlets but each fashioned from the softer… with nary a hook between us