Denial was a lot easier when your head was in the clouds but your memories were stored on microfiche

I can never remember street names navigating strictly by landmarks taking left turns just past abandoned doughnut shops impugning me to keep my marriage

Business or pleasure? Let’s get down to business and ple… This is also known as Dying happy

You can’t watch sports these days… Father Time is undefeated Which is when I always quote Saul… “Vait a minute. Vat about Rocky…

In addiction there is never enough… In God there is always enough How much is enough? As much as we can take And in addiction, we can’t take an…

The soul is an appendix made of wo… and while plenty of people function perfectly well without on… much like the physical appendix– which stores good bacteria

When anything you think Can and will be used against you The purpose of state-funded educat… Will be learning not to think As the doyens of higher learning

If you instill children with self-esteem before they’ve fought and won confidence you’ll make of them cowards

The answer man is left with a ques… What does a woman want? The question woman is stuck with a… A good man is hard to find but eas…

The most common rookie mistake is thinking that because you know what you were saved from that you also know what you were saved for

I was waiting for my ship to come… But maybe I should have made like… And built a ship Especially since my neuroses all c… You’ve probably heard of them–

The three-body problem For example, the motion of the Mo… As disturbed by the Sun Is insoluble As in unpredictable

I knew Remain was in trouble when they announced that a vote fo… was also a vote in favor of renami… Brexit McBrexitface

The two-week lockdown To bend the curve Turned into a year-and-a-half That bent our minds When

As an American I have a posteriori knowledge that Americans pretend without reason to a priori knowledge of the other