In the old country song When Mac Davis sings “Oh lord it’s hard to be humble When you’re perfect in every way” I always assumed

As long as I’m working I only feel free time slipping away The fear is that if I stopped working

Question: What do you want the mo… Answer: The most. This is how you know The devil is always cheating you Because desire is neither

You’ve met your femme fa– tale when you can’t stop wishful thinking about her

To be the bigger person you need to realize that egos are like animals: the smaller their proportions the greater their proportional str…

I have a different problem: there are no feelings to express my words

Everyone knows it could go either way but no one believes it could have gone either way So we tell ourselves

The smartest gal in the room Is the one who realizes All the adults in the room Are emotional children Behaving like holy terrors

In families adept at keeping open secrets no one expects you to state the obvious

As you age getting enough exercise in futility becomes more and more a portent

Everybody knows That everybody hates group project… But everybody is a group project Which is why everybody hates thems… Unless the group wisdom

Asked to account for his success w… he explained that he drives his ca… like he won it on The Price Is R…

I don’t get mad I get odd

War is hell, but be– ing conquered is hell on Earth which makes it much worse

I have half a mind to lose my mind and half a mind to find God The question, natch