Once I realized that I wasn’t afraid of sky diving just that my parachute wouldn’t op… I was able to conquer my fear without ever leaving the ground
When I caught my wife cutting up… she said it was to prevent birds getting stuck in them like six-pac…
One of the great rabbinic sages ex… That this world’s three most inten… Are Jews, dogs, and roosters My take? No one greets the day like a roost…
I wear black socks On the outside Because black is how I feel In the onside
God took the risk of betting on us Because He made us to embrace ris… God is betting that we pass our on… What are you willing to risk your… a. Everything
I was a bullshit artist until I realized a career as a bullshit scientist paid better
If husbands were like pro basketball players I’d be an all star but one with an exceptionally low trade value
Narrow minds see The narrow odds of making their es… Cleaving to the straight and narro… They’ve cleaved the path in two And because they can still see no…
If you want to remain married one partner should stay busy moving the goalposts while the other focuses on running out the clock
If we learned anything from the pandemic it’s that people much prefer being left to their own devices over
Entire lives can be lived waiting for the other shoe to drop although often this just means you’re being crushed at a snail’s…
In my third marriage I went all in on being present in the moment When she left she said that being with me
If you try to control others The ones you will judge the harshe… Are those who are the hardest to c… Who are the ones who tell the trut… Because the truth is always one th…
The epic poem for this epoch will have to say the most with the least
I brought a wife To a gun fight Don’t worry You haven’t met my wife