My children have no idea they are living through a golden age of comedy

Because I was both my private and public self I was neither and my trail went cold from there But now that there are neither

In all my years as warden I could never figure out how to co… with NFPA code 14.14.1.5.1- “Access to exits shall be marked b… readily visible signs in all cases…

Not one of us Has all the answers But we all Have all the answers Because there is only

The buzz you’re suddenly hearing Is the dawning recognition That buzzwords aren’t magic after… And that the real magic words Aren’t just older than time

You’ll know you’re but a prop In someone else’s mise en scene When, after the photo op And the choir’s said amen You’re left to close up shop

When success is made mandatory for all it becomes impossible for any

God is equal parts Ardor and candor But we can’t get a handle on True love

Given a ship that would never sink we proceeded to run it aground in search of

By preserving crucial memories Your amygdala prepares for the fut… Through understanding the past By digging strategic memory holes The internet controls the present

Let there be light blight and hindsight

The far left puts the silent and invisible H in tolerate Guess where? There’s a clue

Where once man strove to move mountains now he settles for making them

Upon my retirement I thought to myself Maybe now I can get some work don…

Nobody grows up wanting to be a mot– ivational speaker