I believe in a future in which man perfects the art of expressing his discontent in bushes that look like clouds

Charlie Brown wants To believe Lucy wants To deceive But maybe, just maybe

They say You can run but you can’t hide Which is why the One Ring With its power of invisibility Is so seductive

I like positive reinforcement As much as the next guy And the next guy Gets a lot of likes So, it’s back to the grindstone

There are only two real superpowers: unacknowledged plagiarism and begrudging cooperation

If you’re going to take sick leave… take FMLA

By Jove, the easi– est way to work on yourself is to get married

People ask if God is real But that’s the wrong question The real question is whether or no… We are afraid to ask that question Because we are afraid of what othe…

Like anything else immortality has its pros and cons: Our chickens never come home to ro… but our cows never come home eithe…

You can die a million times Without a single ego death But one ego death is worth One God

In the story of The boy who cried wolf There was no wolf Until there was And there still is

God has each of us on a leash And it is almost exactly like the… That let’s your dog roam within li… But for one crucial difference– On God’s leash we can go

The smartest gal in the room Is the one who realizes All the adults in the room Are emotional children Behaving like holy terrors

There’s no time like the present: Do it now Like, there’s no time like the pre… Do it now, but from an ironic dist… There’s no time to like the presen…