The Declaration of Independence w… revised to guarantee life, security and the pursuit of criminals

Yes follow the money but only because the money follows the pleasure

One difference between God and A… Is that God tests our faith Because He has faith in us Whereas AI tests our patience Because it is supposed to make lif…

Takeoff always happens just as we are running out of runway

If you’re locked out of your house you can die from exposure but if you’re locked in your house you can die from overexposure

When we restrict someone’s space i… we say that they are doing time implying that the rest of us are doing spacetime You do time

If it’s not anticlimactic it wasn’t worth all the effort

You may think that the unconscious Is there to protect you from seein… How the sausage is made Because if you knew You wouldn’t want to eat it

Only a fool believes that the river obeys the riverbed

An overreaction used to tell you who was guilty Now it’s just another link in

The banyan tree grows up around a host tree which eventually dies leaving the banyan hollow at its c…

I can’t get no satisfaction except self-satisfaction and I pity the fool who would want that

When they shut down Ringling Bros… a down on his luck clown looked into a second career as a m… but was informed that the mimes were only accepting applications f…

Aristocracy failed because it couldn’t keep some of the people happy all of the time Democracy is failing because

When the loyal opposition smelled a rat the administration’s defense centered on the fact that it wasn’t the rats that had carrie…