Because I never learned anything… I learned the hard way that it’s the only way to learn anything at all
When they shut down Ringling Bros… a down on his luck clown looked into a second career as a m… but was informed that the mimes were only accepting applications f…
The first time I went to a robot… I said it hurts when I do this just as I bared my soul and the robot doctor said Don’t do that
We live in an age when the greatest danger is an excess of caution
Heart cancer is vanishingly rare because a heart of gold only spreads love, not gold while a mind of gold inevitably spreads all the way
Learning how to walk is learning how to fall forward while remembering to catch yoursel… again and again Walking is the illusion
I may not be the man who has everything but I’m the man who knows what to get for the man who has everything
If you’ve been put in an impossibl… Consider the possibility that you Have been asked to do the impossib… And that a good leader Would never ask you to do
Were I not happily married to my Jewish bride I would have happily lived out the rest of my days none the wiser
Note that the male tes– tes are exactly the size of small potatoes
Living during COVID-19 Was like trying to eat A bag of individually wrapped M&M…
If human beings are to survive it will be as cyborgs where AI does all the thinking and we supply all the feeling with the caveat that
There’s only one way To win a game of chicken But there are two ways to lose And the only chance of victory Is knowing ahead of time
To whom it may concern: Time travel is impossible
In the latest version of Captain… Captain America’s archenemy is Captain Obvious for all the obvious reasons