The Perfect Game, by Chris Gaither

Each of us gets to ask God one question and this question is your life

My utopia is a dystopia where I get to say I told you so

Lucky for Me, I’m a Natural at Self-censorship

I was the first ever lobster discovered in the wild with a rubber band around my claw clamping it shut

Anti-Defamation in the Post-Zombie Apocalyptic

You’re only allowed to define yourself by what you’re against (anti-fascist, anti-Zionist, etc.) and what you’ve come after

If You Can’t Keep a Family Secret, Then the Joke’s on You

Some families hide the truth in pl… By laughing at it Although it gets confusing for a c… When the truth is a joke That can’t be told

The Circle Is Eternal, Without Beginning or End

We fear that the long game Is a long, lost game Because we find ourselves lost Forgetting how, on the surface of… We can plow forward in trust

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Whenever It Looks Like Batman and Robin Are Climbing a Wall with the Batrope, It Is Just a Camera Trick; We Too Face a Wall That Becomes the Ground Beneath Our Feet the Moment We Believe, Grasp the Rope, and Take Our First Steps Up the Wall

You don’t have to believe in God But if you don’t I believe you will hit a wall That wall is the limit of your thi… Since you will only be able to go

You Are Guaranteed to Lose Your Soul in a Deal with the Devil Because It’s Only a Deal with the Devil If There Is No Risk Involved

We are on the cusp of a great cala… The war of all against all Will commence as soon as No one lifts a finger Do not be fooled–

Thesis, Antithesis, Synthesis

In the confession booth I have a confession to make so that I can receive forgiveness In the show trial I have a confession to make up

Being Outmanned Is Nothing Compared to Being Outclassed

When the ruffian challenges the professional by querying Am I here to amuse you? the professional displays his domi…

AI Is an Adverb Because No One Can Remember How We Got Things Done Before AI

God is a verb Woman is a noun And man is an adjective Put them together and you have Moderate

In the Blink of an Eye

Many people think of life as a gift but to me it’s more like

Let Them Be Fake

It’s a modern miracle: With social media You can finally Have your fake And be it too

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Point Break

People need to be a part of someth… And light is both a particle and a… Surfing, then, is a mystical union… But the internet is a tsunami And surfing the web a death wish

I Still Can’t Believe It

The central paradox of our broken world is known through the feeling of unsurprised disappointment Hope is the belief

Chris Gaither

The Perfect Game

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