For years I sojourned as a humble… Hanging all my hopes On one day emerging as a brilliant… For my moment in the sun Inching ever forward towards the s…
Life is a give and take And since he’ll never give any cri… Because he can’t take any criticis… A people pleaser is the walking de…
The rug saves its harshest critique for the carpet
The path to victo– ry begins with laughing at yourself in defeat
Abiding means to wait expectantly, defiantly, or submiss… and I typically manage all three in the grocery store checkout line even in the express lane
Rule #1- Where God says no, the devil says… And where the devil says no, God… Rule #2- If everybody knows the answers ahe…
Eat, drink And be merry But don’t drink And derive
After the sexual revolution men thought they could finally get what they want AND what they… while women believed they could at… get what they need AND what they…
I have just complet– ed my memoirs: One Hundred Years of Solid Food
My first meeting with God was ver… I knocked on the door and said “Excuse me?” God didn’t look up from what He w… As He calmly and firmly explained
If I say yes That’s just a guess If I say no Then I don’t know If I say maybe
The only way God can love us all the same amoun… Is by loving each of us infinitely And the only way God can love each of us differentl…
The bell curve is the Serpent With the lump in the middle Who ate Adam and Eve By convincing us we’re all mostly… But we’ve proven indigestible
You’ve met your femme fa– tale when you can’t stop wishful thinking about her
That moment when you reclassify yourself from a mystery to an unsolved mystery
