I couldn’t believe that my first e… was still carrying a torch for me and then I saw all my other ex’s b… carrying a pitch fork

The world to come is like a signature look that’s always a new look

I can never remember street names navigating strictly by landmarks taking left turns just past abandoned doughnut shops impugning me to keep my marriage

Don’t sweat the small stuff. It’s all big stuff.

As long as there have been people there have been people wearing mas… the difference now is that each mask comes with an entire cos…

I have a bad habit of predicting the future; it has kept me alive but only to fight another day And yes, my brain is pattern-seeki…

The kingdom of heaven is like a tr… where gentlemen may remove their h… while all others must

It’s obvious that God is doing us… But it’s less widely acknowledged… God calls in all His favors And the only way to return the fav… Is to try and do the impossible

When we were kids we liked to spell Mississippi out loud for fun but we never pronounced the S’s–

Marxism is a sadism with a simple formula: My happiness becomes real the moment yours is dematerialized

The three most powerful words in the English language are not I love you; they are So be it

The internet is based on sensual p… Minus three or four of the senses And one or two dimensions of space…

Antisemitism is suddenly easy to f… It’s a mile wide and just scratch the surface an inch deep– You’ll find it there

There was always an urn on the man… made from terra cotta Little then did I know it was for the remains of the persona non gra…

Everybody knows The pen is mightier than the sword But few understand That it’s because The pen is a lightsaber