When I filter my selfie it becomes a safie

You’ll know you’re but a prop In someone else’s mise en scene When, after the photo op And the choir’s said amen You’re left to close up shop

I couldn’t believe that my first e… was still carrying a torch for me and then I saw all my other ex’s b… carrying a pitch fork

Where once an artist was a creator she is now a creative because a noun requires a verb and we’re meant to do nothing which pays well on the internet

My house built in the 1920s still has a TV antenna like a tattoo you got in early mid… with which you’ve come to have

My fellow Americans Where once we shared a collective… We called the will of the people That simultaneously tamed and expr… We have now regressed to the preci…

In the past walking into a cathedral made you feel small Now it makes you feel fat

In his weekend forays for psilocyb… he had always been wary of poisono… but he never accounted for the con… that did him in in the end

We are hard wired for cooperation to better compete Marxism fails because it enacts a competition

Time is money But time stops at the speed of lig… Which means the buck stops, too Making enlightenment the act of ta… For how you’ve spent your time

My wife and I have remained happi… because she recognizes me as capta… as long as I acknowledge her as air traffic control

Waiting for a sign Is a sign of the times And while we were waiting God kept delivering the raw materi… One day at a time

When they drew a winner It looked like we’d won By the luck of the draw But we came by our good fortune The honest way:

Seeing as no good deed goes unpuni… Everyone else turned the job offer… And went back to waiting on their… Only the Jews understood that In the real world

In 2019 KLM Airlines began advertising that you should take the train instead; it felt like being asked to open up the marriage