The opposite of failure Isn’t success It’s epic failure
God’s hand Is a fist Until the moment You come to fear God
What do you call it when people are so bored that they start playing with fire and soon enough find themselves fighting fire with fire
I couldn’t believe that my first e… was still carrying a torch for me and then I saw all my other ex’s b… carrying a pitch fork
Never get greedy Always cut your losses And remember that it’s better to be lucky than good and it’s bad luck to be so good th…
Of what value Would be my love If I could not Give my life for it Our (patent) pending immortality,…
In the act of creating new life men presage their relationship with death
I know what I want But do I want everyone else To know what I want That is the question
Because bodies make a fart joke of… etiquette used to dictate that whe… passed gas at, e.g., a dinner part… the polite thing to do was to pret… the fart never happened
Quick Draw McGraw taught us that in the wild wild west it’s better… shoot first and ask questions late… But Quick Bluff McGruff the Cyb… knows that on the World Wide Web…
In a Hegelian reversal, I couldn’t com– plain but it would help
Like Coke for Coca-Cola, Mr. Pibb is short for Mr. Pibb, ABD
A poem is like a dream In that it shows us the truth Without telling it Because, truth be told There’s no telling
An army marches on its stomach but it convoys on its internal combustion engine Still, the way to
In families adept at keeping open secrets no one expects you to state the obvious
