Because bodies make a fart joke of… etiquette used to dictate that whe… passed gas at, e.g., a dinner part… the polite thing to do was to pret… the fart never happened

Once you have gained accession to the object of your obsession you’ll remain incapable of graspin… let alone even asking if you just might be the object of…

Our view from the mor– al high ground was blocked by the Mt. Rushmore of golf

If we’re to believe the internet a hero’s journey consists of a hero who goes on an adventure, is victorious in a decisive crisis… and comes home changed or transfor…

I’ve been running the numbers and the running joke that we’re running the show will keep everyone running in plac… until they all start running for t…

The last waltz isn’t over until they come waltzing back in

This is the stage in history where we all give constructive cri… to the demolition crew

It feels like I’m writ– ing an unauthorized au– tobiography

If the world exists on a continuum between utopia and dystopia but instead of polar opposites utopia and dystopia are both hell then at the exact midpoint

I still believe that anything is possible It’s just that now nothing would surprise me

It used to be true that “All the world’s a stage” but now that all the world wide web’s a gauge the real world’s but a Faraday Ca…

A grown up is someone who knows the right thing to do and does it anyway

Early big bang theor– ists were known for eating quite a lot of popcorn

It’s only once you realize There’s no such thing As your own success That you avoid becoming A victim of your own success

If my peccadillos Are mere cigarillos Why is my hide as thick as an arma…