The difference between A garden variety bullshitter And a bullshit artist Is that bullshitting is easy But a bullshit artist

It turns out they were right when they removed the self-destruc… explaining You won’t be needing this anymore now that you have autocorrect

We mistake the feeling of control for the feeling of freedom when freedom actually consists of the courage to take risks Those who encourage us

Each question on the purity test concludes with the following promp… Which two answers are correct? And you always have the same four choices:

The free food programs during the pandemic were great So, to compensate people began to ration love

Like the fern which is seedless but doesn’t lack seeds the universe (that cannot be named… is meaningless

You could say I tried stand-up but for the audience it was more like when the flight attendant demonstrates how to put on your own oxygen mask…

The opposite of failure Isn’t success It’s epic failure

Men are from Mars Women are from everywhere else

If Wile E. Coyote ever caught the Roadrunner he’d suddenly lose interest

When I started telling my employe… Apologies in advance! they still felt compelled by decor… No apologies needed which was how I ended exploitation

The number one rule For doing a number on us Is taking a number Because when our number comes up It’s only ever because our days ar…

It’s not just that The civilization I was born into Is gone– This probably happens To most of history’s long-lived

All forms of life have an unconsci… sentient animals have developed co… to extend the unconscious’ operati… and human beings have developed la… to make consciousness the unconsci…

A wise man once told me When you don’t know what to do do nothing A wise politician