Life is a game of Truth or Dare in which you never lose if you choose dare and where you never win if you choose truth

I often find myself telling God That according to the terms of the… You get what you need God insists I come to terms with the implicati…

The world to come is like a signature look that’s always a new look

There is no Status quo But there is Status

Carry a pen, should you need to write “Note to self: Congratulations!”

Relationships are hard work unless you’ve preemptively announc… that you’re quitting but staying on as a volunteer

Every ego is a God complex And like you I almost had myself convinced that I am who I am

In wristwatch advertisements the doomsday clock is always set to ten past ten

In person we can struggle for equality Online we’ve already achieved

I have just complet– ed my memoirs: One Hundred Years of Solid Food

Blood is thicker than water Unless it’s blood From a turnip

After fifteen years of marriage I thought by now I’d have made partner

The love was exactly as strong as… So, if I could keep the peace I could keep the love Somehow, someway, I found peace And to them this meant war

Unlike the erstwhile folks in acco… AI has a balance sheet for taste and determined that after their recent depreciation all jokes are in poor taste

The never-ending apocalyptic refra… may just be yet another version of death’s denial: The world must be ending