Your mind Is playing a trick on you And you are the trick But since all healing Is a form of getting over yourself
The free food programs during the pandemic were great So, to compensate people began to ration love
The baton is a scroll that says– among other things– The road goes on forever Heaven is
In wristwatch advertisements the doomsday clock is always set to ten past ten
Instead of a Che Guevara t-shirt I have a Carol Burnett henley
Either Life imitates art and becomes an exhibition Or Art Imitates Life
Women give hints So that men will think It was their idea I’ve never been good at taking a h… But I’m good at following orders
Happy me, happy precis: Happy wife, happy life
With social media You can squeeze All of the people All of the time
In five big boardrooms on Earth There soon came to be a great mirt… At the growth in net worth That fed on a dearth In all of the people’s self-worth
Just because we’re not in control Doesn’t mean we’re out of control The rest is commentary
Both my parents were tall and I ended up a shrimp Not coincidentally, my diet has al… largely consisted of pink flamingo… though scientists insist that it’s…
I may not be the man who has everything but I’m the man who knows what to get for the man who has everything
How many introverts does it take to change a light bulb? None– We turn to an inner light
In real life we used to say I’ll see your talk and raise you action but that was just too risky Preferring no stakes