Fox News said it was “Fair and B… which supposedly meant that it was… because it was balanced but really it meant that it was fa… because it wasn’t balanced–

The difference between your superego and God is that your superego says You must, but you can’t leaving you with worlds of guilt

Actually marr– iage is like riding a tan– dem unicycle

We had a perfect plan for putting the genie back in the bottle but to get the genie out we had shattered the bottle

In this charming reboot of a classic kidlit gumshoe series our eponymous hero Wikipedia Brown solves thought crimes by

On paper Scratch that On screen The devil looks unbeatable Since odds always favor

We are gathered around our phones Like little campfires And all we ever hear Are scary stories

I can’t get no satisfaction except self-satisfaction and I pity the fool who would want that

I’m not scared of the explicit danger I’m afraid of the implicit threats

On the Mt. Rushmore of cartoon mice I would put four Jerrys

You start out needing money to advance your ideology but you end up mouthing your ideol… to rake in more money

In order to minimize intra-tribal… while aggressively pursuing class… progressive educated elites turn t… like common schoolyard bullies And the fact that you can only

Average academics Have a pet theory Dominant academics Have a pet theory about pet theori…

At bottom God is a brute fact and Satan a brutal fact

In the world to come The United Nations will finally r… If you can’t beat ‘em Join ‘em