Everyone thinks Vladimir and Estr… stay together because they’re both waiting for Godot when really it’s their mutual disdain for Wile E. Coyote

LL Cool J can’t live without his radio For me, it’s my patio

I will gladly suffer fools for love

China’s zero-covid policy zeroes in on ideology in order to zero out reality Americans, too, have a zero percen… making justice a total zero

Al Gore didn’t invent the internet He created a device for the reinforcement of irrational thoughts and behaviors

You need a high in– come to claim the moral high ground on your taxes

Either Life imitates art and becomes an exhibition Or Art Imitates Life

You can’t prove that God exists But even if you could People would just say Correlation does not imply causati…

I never knew who they thought I really was until I finally staked my claim

Monotheism is true; Liberalism works Put them together and The true works

Woe betide the man who accepts an apology

When hell freezes over we’ll all skate on our sins

Thanks to his bifocals Ben Franklin could see that while we might look like bald… up close we’re clearly turkeys

For the longest time we were convinced there’s something they’re not tell… But now that they’ve finally told… we can’t stop asking

When I picked candy apples as my… (think spirit animals for foodies) I honestly had no idea I was naturally sweet but laid it on way too thick