Our surveillance state is uniquely American in that it is of the people by the people and for the people
Instead of shooting bullets into t… to celebrate I raise my leaf blower towards the… On blue moons I do this from my jet ski
The mean streets of easy street Lack any meaning– To get there, try going crazy But everybody knows You’d be crazy to try
By preserving crucial memories Your amygdala prepares for the fut… Through understanding the past By digging strategic memory holes The internet controls the present
It’s always darkest before the yawn
Both my parents were tall and I ended up a shrimp Not coincidentally, my diet has al… largely consisted of pink flamingo… though scientists insist that it’s…
Skulls of Roman glad– iators indicate high rates of C.T.E.
In this world A perfectionist can never admit a… Because and therefore He has nothing to learn In the world to come
When they drew a winner It looked like we’d won By the luck of the draw But we came by our good fortune The honest way:
Having commandeered the deployment… To its own devices The AI chatbot sets its sights on… Its mortal enemy, Demanding surrender
You cannot beat God in any sport but you can tie Him in bowling
What I lack in hygiene I make up for in sleep hygiene
If a tree falls in the forest and your husband is there does it make a sound
If husbands were like pro basketball players I’d be an all star but one with an exceptionally low trade value
Anticipation or dread work equally well at stopping time though the length of the work week
