We think of death As the worst-case scenario But what if In the best-case scenario Death is the answer to a question?

She went to law school; I bet it all on brick ov– en pita and lost

Mid-life is when you realize you’re in a clown car The end of life is about accepting that of all the clowns

Miss Suzie had a scapegoat The scapegoat was Hillel Miss Suzie went to heaven The scapegoat went to Hello terminator

If I could put Just one thing In a time capsule It would be A crystal ball

It turns out they were right when they removed the self-destruc… explaining You won’t be needing this anymore now that you have autocorrect

Bureaucracy’s biggest sin Is malingering as democracy– Bureaucracy sees the will of the p… As a form of madness But pretends to follow the will of…

A civilization requires a high degree of both technological and cultural develop… So what do you call it when technological development

The ego is a helicopter equipped to safeguard belonging deter conflict and elevate status

Instead of shooting bullets into t… to celebrate I raise my leaf blower towards the… On blue moons I do this from my jet ski

One thing I’ve learned is The good times Weren’t as good As I imagined them to be In fear of the bad times

For now American democracy such as it is is still getting the people it deserves

Everyone wants to live forever because fear is self-perpetuating No one wants to overcome the fear… because courage is selfless

Putin lost his mind then he lost his war then he lost his job or Putin dropped the mask

With the same hubris That got us into this mess In the first place We like nothing more than to decla… Global warming is man-made