Carry a pen, should you need to write “Note to self: Congratulations!”

You know a hipster is aging gracef… When he comes to see that Objects in mirror Are closer than they appear

The most common rookie mistake is thinking that because you know what you were saved from that you also know what you were saved for

Love your enemy but do continue to hate your rival factions

Is it really leading by example when I floss in the office men’s r… after lunch or is this what the Buddhist’s cal… bodhisattva exhibitionism

The ontological proof tells us It is impossible to doubt God– Any such doubt is proof That we just need to think bigger This much is uncontroversial

When people ask Business or pleasure? I want to say Life’s only pleasure Is unfinished business

I thought I was choosing between Life and death When really, I was choosing betwe… First and last place So, when I thought I chose life

Time flies when you’re having fun And the key to fun is wanting Not having

An overreaction used to tell you who was guilty Now it’s just another link in

Beware the self-loathing salesman who loves what he does– If you buy what he’s selling then you bought it because you broke it

Brexit is a fantasy that a people who previously sat astride a global empire can now sit apart from globalizati… when in reality

My house built in the 1920s still has a TV antenna like a tattoo you got in early mid… with which you’ve come to have

Smile and the whole world smiles with yo… Laugh and the whole world smiles with yo… Cry

At first everyone was to be followed by a p… to protect us from terrorists or kill us if we were terrorists But then it was decided that