It’s a truism that life is a roller coaster ride But it’s also true that unlike a roller coaster things get even more interesting

It used to be that if you were obscure you had to be able to handle the truth and if you were famous

I am not who I think I am I am not who you think I am And I am not even who I think you… I am who I-Am-Who-I-Am thinks I…

When the shit hits the fan at least I know I won’t be wearing flip-flops

My dreams are no longer about wish fulfillment but about the Amazon fulfillment center

Individual psychology is formed by… to lead the group into competition and it is only through the struggle between groups that the individual experiences

It used to be that We could feed our souls By serving others Or feed our egos By serving ourselves

In a real life version of the ugly duckling discovering h… I was the reject popsicle stick who at long last found out I was a handy tongue depressor

Somewhere between 27% and 53% of… none of which students can legally… is wasted Let’s split the difference and call it 40%

Hell is having infinite wishes but using them all to wish for infinite wishes Heaven is having infinite wishes but only needing

A planning committee’s second most… Is coming up with a plan That everyone can agree to But no one is happy with This sounds strange until you real…

If you’re going to take sick leave… take FMLA

According to Exxon Mobil absolute solar power corrupts absolutely

In the last stage of capitalism the rich will be ascetics

If the truth were merely regarded as false it might still have found its purpose but once degraded into