The stapler inevitably jams And it’s always the stapler That jams the copier Except for the times it jams When you try to copy something you…

I am not who I think I am I am not who you think I am And I am not even who I think you… I am who I-Am-Who-I-Am thinks I…

“A quantum state is not an element… instead, it represents the degrees… about the possible outcomes of mea… Just so: A mental state is not an element o…

In the New Age everybody knows that everything happens for a reason but nobody knows the reason so, everybody pastes together

In His infinite wisdom God made the pen mightier than the… Which is why the internet’s first… Is the First Amendment It’s only once free speech and fre…

The number one cause of divorce Is holding a grudge We are divorced from reality Because we hold a grudge against t… We resent the truth

In an online community You don’t have to commute But your sins will never be commut…

If I could change one thing about… I would stop trying to make myself Impervious to change

When I listen to the blues I can’t stop thinking of advice I’d give

The older I get the less I pause for effect This is because the clock is ticking and I’d rather not waste my time

I always liked making people laugh until my undergraduates told me that it was an abuse of power asym…

Google Glass never took because smart phones are a prosthetic for the hands not the eyes

You can’t make art worth dying for with what art is worth paying for

When I was a kid the rule was one kid got to pour two glasses of Coke and the other kid

We’ve taken the last ember in the ashes for a glimmer of hope