Your eyes are your tools For processing light But don’t trust the process– Trust the light
For our civilization to function everyone must be willing to meet at the disappointed hour where if you’re not five minutes t… you’re early
Somehow we evolved to love a challenge but hate a challenge to our thinking
Big Brother used to just Cross his fingers To avoid telling the truth Then uncrossed them into a V for Vacancy
We can all agree that life is the number one cause of death But no one wants to admit that death is the only cause of ne… Nevertheless, we love our children
You can’t quite see it but Moe also pokes Curly right in his third eye
In the age of divorce It needs to be said: If you don’t want to end up divorc… Do not covet your neighbor’s ex-wi…
In a Hegelian reversal, I couldn’t com– plain but it would help
The reason God made us mortal Is the reason hiding in plain sigh… So that Knowing we must die anyway We might choose
Instead of shooting bullets into t… to celebrate I raise my leaf blower towards the… On blue moons I do this from my jet ski
Scientists insist that 95% of the… consists of undetectable, unknowab… because this belief makes their ca… Like you and me the little that they do know
In the story of The boy who cried wolf There was no wolf Until there was And there still is
Our two choices are The fear of God Or the fear of death And since we gain wisdom through t… Then we must have the faith not to…
A man starts out lying for instant gratification Inevitably, this progresses to buy… his unending rationalizations
I’ve never been good at shaving I struggle to put on deodorant wit… And I’m frequently dripping tooth… Onto that same shirt In this an many other ways
