Time marches on and for mere mortals it marches to the beat of its own… which is how we got rhythm But the immortals found
If husbands were like pro basketball players I’d be an all star but one with an exceptionally low trade value
Told to shut my mouth I took them literally Zipped my lips And held my breath Until I could stomach it no longe…
Ours was the first all you can eat… to earn a coveted Michelin star and I always thought it was becaus… when you ordered the whole enchila… it came with bottomless fries
You must go on. I can’t go on. I’ll ramble on.
In my second marriage I went all in on being authentic When she left she said that being with me
The Declaration of Independence w… revised to guarantee life, security and the pursuit of criminals
All cars have always been getaway cars because they tell the world how much you’re getting away with but now all cars are SUVs
It’s not just that “Man is wolf to man” It’s that he has always known this about himself and yet
The biggest change Since I found God Is who I am Trying to impress Which is how you know
Is it really leading by example when I floss in the office men’s r… after lunch or is this what the Buddhist’s cal… bodhisattva exhibitionism
When you have to be rich just to be middle class what do you have to do to be rich? That’s what they call a good quest… And since you have no choice
By hook or by crook I do it all by the book
Read between the lines: We are behind enemy lines
Goodbye is not always goodbye In fact, it never is For while I may never see you aga… I’ll never unsee you
