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Chris Gaither

Chris Gaither

Haiku

In a Hegelian
reversal, I couldn’t com–
plain but it would help

Other works by Chris Gaither...
Freedom Is Watching Yourself Do It With Your Eyes Closed

You can’t be free of self-consciousness so you have to be free with self-consciousness; we call this condition
“You want to know my occupation? I get paid to rock the nation: I go to work, I go to work, I go to work”

Seeing as no good deed goes unpuni… Everyone else turned the job offer… And went back to waiting on their… Only the Jews understood that In the real world
Get Bent, AI

The AI arms race will be won By a people who learn how to bend… To the will of the people This can only be done by a people Who have learned (and remembered)…
Lord, Hear Our Prayer

God broke in half-way through my prayer and said You’re on mute
 1
Fiber Keeps You Secular

In the past walking into a cathedral made you feel small Now it makes you feel fat
If the Devil Meets Your Price, He Underpaid

The reason every man has his price is because he always fails to real… 1. that he can never get what he w… 2. this makes his desire priceless
“The narcissist’s whole life is a two-fold attempt to both satisfy the inexorable demands of his inner tribunal and to prove wrong its harsh and critical nature”

The narcissist is a two—sided coin… Heads, I need you Tails, I hate you– and the more you meet a narcissist… the more they will hate you
Enemy of the People Pleaser

A man without an enemy is like a vampire with a reflection
A Woman Knows What She Wants and That’s Her Biggest Problem

The answer man is left with a ques… What does a woman want? The question woman is stuck with a… A good man is hard to find but eas…
“Aren’t you a little short for a stormtrooper?”

My wife– All 5 feet of her– Busted me out of prison So that I could get back To a life of time
How Do I Love Me? (Sonnet #1)

How do I love me? Let me count t… I love me to the depths of my stom… and when in line in front of a lum… I’ll take the last fried rice in t… I love me to the level of Wall St…
“The ultimate reason is to create a securitized order, a general neutralization of peoples on the basis of a final nonevent... the goal is the end of history... on the basis of a preventive terror putting an end to any possible event”

The pandemic lockdowns were the pa… and penultimate nonevent because o… limits of human imagination– We could only imagine shutting everything down
Trapdoor Spiderman

When I got my first honey-do list after the wedding I explained to my bride that I us… until I was bitten by one of the 5… that don’t make webs
It’s Happening Again

Everybody knows that Jews are indigenous to Israe… that they were frogmarched out into the oft-deadly diaspora by th… and that they have openly and
You’ll Know It When You Feel It

They call it open heart surgery But no one says open brain surgery Because, by default Our minds are closed And the only way to change minds



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